People always say that there is light at the end of the tunnel. For some reason my version of the tunnel is now a funnel. Why? I have no idea, but that feels like the right term now somehow.
I have noticed that part of my internet addiction (yes, I think I have one) is because I try to find the answers online. And by answers I don´t mean the timetables for public transportation or the explanation for the error message I get on excel. By answers I mean simple understanding on what is the meaning of life? What is love? Who am I really? And so on. Since internet has so many answers it seems like the logical place to find answers to those questions too. What could go wrong?
I have also noticed that I´m not the only one doing it. Internet is full of spiritual sites, wise quotes and inspirational shit (pardon my French). The truth must be there somewhere! You just need to put the pieces together, right?
I have spent my whole life trying to find the pieces. I started by collecting quotes from tea packages while still wearing diapers, reading comics that I thought had some insight, and later browsing through all the books that would challenge my views. But what I have found is only words being twisted from one perspective to another. As much as I would like to find the right things, it seems words are simply not enough. Words feel like pebbles at the river bank. They might influence the current a little, but they make no real change. The water changes the pebbles really.
Oh water, what are you?
Flowing into the funnel?
I´m making no sense, but who cares - it´s just words, really.
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